Breaking the Mold: How We Raised Our Son to Challenge Society’s Expectations and Thrive

10 Unorthodox Tips for Raising a Son

That’s me and my boy. Photo Credit: Black Thumb Studios. Used with permission.

“Here’s how this is going to work. You’re not going to believe I have the audacity to do this, but I am.”

The guy at the mic tried to tell us he understood- that he’d been in our place before.

It didn’t help.

“You’ve got 5 minutes to say goodbye,” he continued, “then all the parents are going to exit the doors to my left, and all the students are going to exit the doors to my right where their orientation leaders will greet them.”

He was met with awkward laughter.

There wasn’t a parent in the room that was OK with that plan, but we knew the man was right. This was the way it needed to be.

I waited as I my son hugged my wife first, then his younger sister, and finally he turned to hug me. I grabbed him and hugged him tight, and just when I thought he was ready for me to let him go I pulled him in a little closer. I was crying, and there’s a painful lump in my throat as I type these words today. I wondered to myself why it hit me so hard. Then in that moment I had a realization.

It wasn’t hard.

It was the moment my wife and I had been working for, and it was glorious.

To be sure, my tears were tinged with sadness because my boy is moving out and moving on. I’m going to miss him. There’s a bit of anxiety as well because protecting him will be harder from this point on. But those weren’t the reasons for the tears.

The fact is, I couldn’t be prouder of the man he is turning out to be, and we have faith he’ll have a positive impact on our world. I find myself looking up to him. So as I hugged him before parting ways at the end of the goodbye ceremony, there was no fear. There was no anger or resentment. Just love and appreciation for the 18 years I had with him and great expectations for what may come.

I was prompted to reflect for a moment when my cousin, Wes, texted me this morning to tell me he was thinking of us. Wes is at the opposite end of the fatherhood experience. He and his spouse are expecting a baby any day now, and they’re experiencing all the appropriate…